How not to get a $700 dollar discount on your $800 tattoo.

I have pretty good prices. I offer deals a lot, especially on Facebook. Especially to my friends. Especially to people who promote me for no other reason than they would like to see me succeed. But the chances of getting a $800 tattoo for $100 are slim to none.

I’ll admit, there have been a couple of times I’ve given out a deal like that. In those couple of instances, I was well aware that the client was hurting for money, needed the tattoo for therapeutic purposes, and had an awesome design in mind that basically gave me free reign. Also, they were regulars. Also, I had an opening and they jumped on it.

If you are thinking that you want me to give you an $800 tattoo for 100 bucks, do not do the following:

Tell me that one of my good friends sent you in.

I only have a few.

Tell me that that good friend that sent you in told you to ask for Daryl.

My name is Darl.

Tell me that the good friend of mine, that doesn’t know my name, told you that I would give you the $800 tattoo for 100 dollars.

Not one of my good friends would ever presume to give you a price quote.  Quoting tattoos consists of too many variables. They wouldn’t do that. They also wouldn’t expect me to give discounts like that out without at least checking with me first.

Tell me that you know someone who will do it for $100.

That sounds like a great deal, you should take them up on it. Or was that the same person who’s tattoo you want me to cover up?

Tell me that you know you could sit for 7 or 8 hours because you handled your one and a half hours in the chair last time someone tattooed you really well.

After about 10 or 20 minutes of getting tattooed you will get an endorphin rush. That is why after ten minutes in the chair, it stops hurting. That endorphin rush wears off after a couple of hours. Then shit starts hurting again. I’m not opposed to tattooing anyone all day if they can really handle it, but I’m not about to block off an entire day on my calendar if you haven’t sat longer than a couple hours to know that you’ll be able to take it. See, if you tap out, I’ve got nothing to do the rest of the day.

Ask me to do an $800 tattoo for $100.

I’m all for haggling, but that shit’s ridiculous.

The only chance you have of getting an $800 tattoo from me for $100 is if I offer. But, first, you’ll have to get my name right.